Friday, 13 July 2007

Jolly hockey sticks!

Weeeeeeeeell, this is all very exciting. There hasn’t been so much literary action in my life since Veronika, Bibiana and Elena all slipped furtive notes into my office mailbox on Voronĕžská announcing their arrival for full oral examinations on the red swivel chair within half an hour of each other. Where were you with that Master of Counselling back then, BA?! Baaaaah!

Yes, it’s a red letter day when not one, but two (fuck, no, three) blog signatories post in material on the very same day. And so it deserves a separate post to mark the occasion. What’s more, I think we’re about to surpass the largest number of hits on a single day since the advent of this blog. BA may think that he hasn’t been making his presence felt in recent times, but actually mate, I can see you lurking and skulking around the ether on an almost daily basis, desperately trying to remain above my jibes and goading until you just couldn’t take it anymore. If the Internet had been around in 1899 I’m sure virtual urine extraction would have had its own subsection under the protocol outlawing torture within the Geneva Conventions. That ‘web stats’ icon on the right-hand side of the page allows me to get a fairly good picture of the traffic zooming around this site like a Los Angeles inner-city freeway (actually more like a nonagenarian taking her 1956 Hillman Humper for a Sunday drive in the country at 6am and coming to a juddering halt at the letterbox). I can see visits taking place overnight from Dretovice (Rotten) to Jihlava (PAM) to Jihomoravsky kraj (tvc) to Idaho (guess who). Hence my recent programme of targeted goading ;) It’s only a matter of time now before we become world famous with hits from all over the globe.

Nice to see Bedřich again and hear that Pepa and Anička are settling into a groove and allowing the old man some quality internet time (and unlike BA you haven’t forgotten your logon password). Those long silences sometimes make me a tad paranoid that I’ve been overdoing it on the Flickr comments…I’m still intrigued though by what else comes on the John Holmes list of excuses rather than the abbreviated Paul Wolfowitz Tiny Tadger list. Otherwise, I think all of us, apart from Rotten, sympathise with the discomfort of incoherent thoughts; just take a look at the utter tosh here resulting from my efforts to keep the Hillman Humper turning over. I leave Rotten out here because has anyone else noticed how he can bang out 1,000 word narratives while allegedly banjoed and not make single spelling or grammatical error? That’s just not right, dude.

Glad you reminded me of that brawl in Salamandr. That was a real doozy. I don’t mean the brawl itself but rather Bedřich going agricultural and swinging a big haymaker into a guy who had actually come to our aid. Otherwise, it was personally notable for resulting in a haematoma on my knee from when I’d been trying to crack open one opponent’s biscuit. That was only one of two occasions in all those Czech years that I’d actually been sober enough to try an offensive move; all the other times I just had the pus kicked out of me.

In the meantime, put a lay-by on one of those items from the Zastavarna on Konevova and I’ll drop by to pick it up next year. Will be visiting a little slice of CZ this evening – it’s the birthday of one of the members of the Czech expat community here and I’ll be the only Kiwi within cooee of the place.

No comments: